


With Naga's Guidance. Maybe. Probably Not.

by MorganPrinceofYlisse



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: AU, Crack, F/M, Fire Emblem - Freeform, I'm Sorry, M/M, Male Morgan - Freeform, OOC much?, Pure cancer, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, WTF, chrom breaking things that shouldn't be broken, edgy college students, even edgier teens, he brought it upon himself, honestly don't know, i'm probably missing a bunch of characters, idfk what this is, in which everyone may or may not be high, lots of swearing, pretty princess grima, pyromaniac, questionable shit all around, relationships are weird af, robin as a furry?, robin's done with everyone's shit, shitposting at its finest, stahl eating too much, tharja stalking, the only serious adult isn't really one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2018-07-09
Packaged: 2019-05-25 15:07:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14979758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganPrinceofYlisse/pseuds/MorganPrinceofYlisse
Summary: Robin makes a group chat, and immediately regrets it. Things start to go downhill (or uphill?? maybe sideways) from there. Everyone may or may not be high, including the author.





	With Naga's Guidance. Maybe. Probably Not.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theEliteVirion: robin why didn’t you add your beautiful woman?
> 
> Falchionboi: probably because of you virion.
> 
> theEliteVirion: Moi? O.o
> 
> morgan: who else? no one else chases pussy like you
> 
> Pure Joy: ^^^^
> 
> theEliteVirion: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> morgan: 
> 
> morgan: thats not a compliment

### Chapter 1

  
. . . . .

_**Robin** has created a new chat!_

  


_**Robin** has added **Falchionboi** , **Future Witness** , **gotathingforkilling** , **ayyitsVaike** , **theEliteVirion** , **morgan** , **Pure Joy** , and **Sumia** to the new chat!_

  


**Robin:** Good. It worked.

 **morgan** : why am i even here

 **Future Witness** : Hello, Robin. Morgan.

 **Robin:** Good morning, Lucina.

 **theEliteVirion:** Ladies, it is I. Good morning, beautiful doves~

 **morgan:** i’m not a girl you crazy weirdo. stay away

 **Robin:** yeah you are tfym

 **morgan:** i'm genderly wavy theres a difference

 **Robin:** gENDERLY WAVY

 **morgan:** stfu

 **theEliteVirion:** robin why didn’t you add your beautiful woman?

 **Falchionboi:** probably because of you, virion.

 **theEliteVirion:** Moi? O.o

 **morgan:** who else? no one else chases pussy like you

 **Pure Joy:** ^^^^

 **theElitreVirion:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

**morgan:**

**morgan:** thats not a compliment

 **Robin:** She’s not mine .-.

 **Robin:** And she keeps stalking my every move. Yesterday, she told me everything that I did last night before I went to bed and how I accidentally set the stove on fire. Like, how the fuck did she even get in my house?!

 **Falchionboi:** That’s some dedication. I’d congratulate her but…

 **Robin:** Chrom, she told me EVERYTHING I did last night.

 **Falchionboi:** .....shit

 **morgan:** i’m surprised you even have a girl chasing after you

 **morgan:** your not exactly “lady material"

 **ayyitsVaike:** more like trashe material

 **Robin:** Says you, Vaike.

 **Future Witness:** You “accidentally” set the stove on fire.

 **Robin:** shut up

 **theEliteVirion:** She probably wants the d ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **theEliteVirion:** just give it to her

 **theEliteVirion:** you’ll feel better about her stalking you. Just let her into your apartment and then pounce on her

 **theEliteVirion:** skip the sadistic foreplay, just shove it in

**Pure Joy:**

**Falchionboi:**

**Future Witness:**

**Sumia:**

**morgan:** wtaf

 **Robin:** You're disgusting.

 **theEliteVirion:** do you need help wooing the ladies? come and let uncle virion do it fo you

 **Robin:** Stay tf away or I’ll be setting you on fire next

 **Pure Joy:** he probably didnt want bring her furry kink in

 **Robin:** No that’s clearly not it.

 **Falchionboi:** He does have a strange aversion to furries

 **Robin:** She dressed ONCE as a furry. It does not mean she’s a furry. She just didn’t think that I hated animals

 **Falchionboi:** Yeah...you slammed the door in her face, shouted “BEGONE THOT” and threw salt all over the floor. Then decked me after I asked if you told her to do that and forgot to pay her into your bed

 **ayyitsVaike:** lmfaoo

 **Robin:** I’ll knock you into next week if you ever speak of that again.

 **Robin:** Vaike, don’t encourage him-

 **Falchionboi:** you should see how he tries to avoid her during and between classes. he almost got suspended once for throwing his textbooks at her head and running through campus screaming bloody murder

 **Robin:** shSHSHsh

 **Sumia** : What in the world

 **Future Witness:** So...if Tharja did that for you...you have the furry kink? She doesn’t, you do?

 **Robin:** nO

 **Pure Joy:** I didn’t peg u for someting like that Robin

 **Falchionboi:** it does explain a lot

 **Sumia:** What Tharja does it only for you, she’s even said so

**Robin:**

**theEliteVirion:** on that note i can’t help you my dear boy. i dont do furries

 **Robin:** when have you done anyone, Virion?

 **Robin:** I do not have a furry kink, and good. I didn’t want your help in the first place.

 **Robin:** I don’t even like Tharja

  


_**Pure Joy** has added **roobinbae♡** to the chat!_

_**Pure Joy** has named the chat to **Robins Love Town**!_

  


**roobinbae♡:** why didnt u add me robin? ;;

 **roobinbae♡:** aww u even had it named for me~

 **Robin:** Fuck you, Lissa-

  


_**Robin** has named the chat to **tHOT BEGONE**!_

  


**Falchionboi:** You better not

 **Robin:** I don’t do minors

 **Pure Joy:** U don’t do anyone

 **ayyitsVaike:** Damn son xD

 **roobinbae♡:** robin it doesn’t matter if u say u dont love me

 **roobinbae♡:** ur just lying yourself ;)

 **Robin:** Your definition of lying is in need of Jesus

 **roobinbae♡:** ill help you realise that im the only one for u ;))

 **theEliteVaike:** this if your own battle to fight. after you came out as a furry kink im leaving you behind to fend for yourself brother

 **Robin:** Hey, have any of you ever considered

 **Robin:** shutting the fuck up

 **Robin:** and listening for once?

 **roobinbae♡:** hey wait you dont add me but you add henry

 **roobinbae♡:** wHY

 **roobinbae♡:** hes creepier than I am

 **Robin:** Henry may be a psycho but he’s more likable than you

 **roobinbae♡:** and i’m ur one and only

 **roobinbae♡:** ….i’ll just curse his voodoo doll mwahaHAHAhahA

 **morgan:** i’m muting you all. i’m in class atm and this is all cancer

**Author's Note:**

> I thought this would be a good idea and realised it was cancer, but found it pretty entertaining. I hope you do as well. Updates will be slow, or this may just be a stand alone oneshot and the rest of those tags were a waste of time to think of. Haven't decided yet.


End file.
